Monologue: It is hard to understand me????

A lot of things has happen lately... But what sadden me is, my friend keep telling me to go to a party that I dont feel invited... I am tired of this kind of feeling. Being a wallflower that people doesnt even care whether you go or not... invite half heartedly. even if i go, no one care if i even exist.. why go? I dont have money to. only have 218 in account.. I have no mom and dad to call to ask for money. My oldest sister has her hardest tome now, so who else should I bother? Why cant people understand that I have no one in my family to support me and I cannot keep bothering my friend for help. I have no clothes to wear, no shoes to match, nothing! Please, live me alone!!!! please, understand that I have no one! no one for things like this!!!!!!! :'( :"( :'(